Friday, September 09, 2005

Fake Disaster, Meet Real Disaster


About this time, I have to think the Powers That Be at "Passions" are hoping the world just forgets about the show's pathetic "disaster" storyline, the one that was supposed to be the summer highpoint. It was in bad enough taste coming on the heels of the south-east Asia tsunami, but now we have a real disaster close to home to compare it to.

I think the worst thing that happened in both the Harmony earthquake and tsunami was that a half-brother and sister slept together. Again. Other than that, buildings were slightly damaged and hair was mussed. Both storms were amazingly local. We know that Boston is the nearest big city to Harmony, but it doesn't seem to have been touched by either incident.

Real disasters, we're learning, do a bit more damage and aren't so nicely confined. The only thing that both the Harmony and New Orleans disasters had in common was that FEMA was absent from both.

Those Powers That Be look kind of creepy, in hindsight, for treating the disaster storyline so lightly and for making it so convenient. I feel creepy just for having watched those episodes, when the news channels are now filled with real images of suffering.

It would be a laugh if Hurricane Katrina hit before the "Passions" disaster storyline aired. What would the producers have done then? Pull the episodes? They might have been forced to, since it would have been in horrible taste to air them. I mean, "The Price is Right" just caught hell for airing a repeat in which the grand prize was a trip to N'Awlins. (Click here and scroll down to read the story.)

Rather than risk this happening again, I think the "Passions" producers should stick to what they know best: romantic storylines in which the men go shirtless. How about if Fox, Ethan, Noah, and Chris strip down to make a Chippendales-style 2006 calendar, with the proceeds going to Hurricane Katrina relief agencies. Now that's a plotline I'd love to see.

I'd even buy a calendar.

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